I leave for Mansfield in a week, man. My second year. I feel kind of... weird about it. But alas. Shit, I still need to order my books. I should put them on my credit card... once I get it. And then immediately pay it off. That would help my credit score rise up, yeah? I like that idea.

I've been playing FarmVille a lot lately and hanging out with Jeff/Dave/Chris/Tikisortof. Dave is getting more and more annoying by the day. I hate how he talks about things like he knows what he's talking about. Gah. It's just irritating. And I just want to punch him in the face.

BAGELS ARE DELICIOUS. AND SO IS TRAIL MIX.

Jeff, Dave, Ron, and Tiki are going to go see a movie. Chris and I are... going to hang around the house because we are poor. And I don't like gore. Oh well.

Sigh.

- Ash

Alright. You've heard all about this 'legal' herb and you want to try it for yourself. That's cool. But how do you do it, you wonder? Is it like cigarettes? Marijuana? How do I do this shit?


Well, let me give you some hints and tips.

First off - you need to be not moving. You can't be in a car, especially if you're driving. You should be sitting down somewhere where there isn't too much clutter. It pretty much needs to be an area that is like... drunk-safe. That's best.

You should also have a sitter - someone to watch you and make sure you don't do something stupid (more on that later). As long as you do it responsibly, you should be all right, but all people take stuff differently.

Okay, you've secured your area and you have someone who will sit for you. Now what? Well, you need your salvia. I recommend SalviaZone. It's fairly expensive, but it's good shit and you know what you're getting. It's just pure salvia and salvia extract.

But what kind of salvia should you get? If you're doing SalviaZone, you should probably smoke Green - they give out free samples that are about 2.5 pipefuls. If you're doing Purple Sticky Salvia, you should go with 20X.

Now, what to smoke it out of? Let me tell you right now - salvia is some harsh shit. It will make you cough if you aren't a regular smoker. It's best to smoke it out of a water pipe. The smoke is more concentrated and the water really smoothes it out and makes sure you don't get any ash. Because salvia burns so quickly, and it only takes four 'hits' to burn out a bowlful, this is really important. Ash in your lungs burns like hell.


Got all that? All righty. Keep in mind, you also need fine mesh screens for your water pipe. Salvia is a very well-ground up product and will fall right through wider meshes.

You're sitting somewhere quiet with a trusted friend to sit for you, you're lighting it up and taking your first hit - hold that shit in! Count to 30 in your head before you let it out. This is very, very important. If you don't hold it long enough, your body will not absorb the drug in the plant.

If your body is familiar with smoke of various types, you might want to try what I call a "megahit". It's very hard to explain, but you basically suck on the pipe and let the smoke collect, but you don't suck it all in until you feel that there is enough smoke. It's a harsher, but quicker. It usually takes about three or four regular hits to get the same effect of a "megahit".

Now, set down your water pipe and exhale. In about ten seconds, you will get hit by a metric shit-ton of tractor trailers. Depending on how strong your salvia is, you could either just feel a little weird or full out fucking trip balls. The last time I did salvia (earlier this afternoon), I megahitted on some 50X potency and went to a different universe. I was looking at a night sky, my hands were trees, and an ashtray was the moon. Some water bottles were space ships... et cetera.

It fucks your shit up, is what I'm saying.

DO NOT TRY HIGHER SHIT THE FIRST TIME. I can not stress this enough. You will piss yourself (or worse). I sweat like a pig and drool a lot. My friend tries 80X potency the first time and she collapsed on her living room floor (she was standing) and promptly pissed herself. Just like alcohol, you need to build yourself up.

Some people feel nauseous from salvia. Some people trip. Some people puke. Some people really enjoy it, and some peoply really hate it. It all depends.


But be safe and be responsible. Trust me, you'll have more fun that way.

~ Ash

Got a job working at McD's. Not a bad gig, I'm happy enough with it. They only give me like 10-15 hours a week though, so I'm looking for either a second part-time job or a full-time one. Let's hope that ends all right, yeah?

Been writing a lot lately. And I've also learned that I don't feel the urge to snack if I sit in my bedroom instead of the kitchen. I wonder why that is, huh? *sarcasm* Lulz.

Lemmi's been my main friend lately. I think Jeff is sick of me. I don't blame him. I'm sick of me too.

Gah.

I think I'll just go write some more. Maybe go to the grocery store later.

- Ash